Bad news. Dr. House says you may be dying. Good news. He has a pill that may cure you. Or it might not. 
But the good news is if you don’t have the disease, the pill will have no effect at all. But you don’t want the pill. Of course House calls you an idiot, but you insist that you don’t want to take a pill that might not do anything at all. Now House knows that something else is up. Depending on the point in the episode, you’re probably going to have a seizure now.
Now let’s talk energy policy. Congress is considering bills that would make gasoline price gouging a federal crime. But, as the AP reports:
President Bush has promised to veto any anti-gouging measure, arguing that it’s not needed.
What a strange argument. If prices are being artificially inflated, it’s a crime and crime needs to be punished. It’s a cornerstone of the conservative philosophy of justice that tough penalties prevent crime, so even if prices aren’t being inflated, this law may prevent people from doing so. And, of course, if price gouging is simply a figment of the liberal imagination — never done, never considered and never to be done — then the bill will do nothing whatsoever. So why, when the American people are paying $4 per gallon for gasoline, does Bush not want to even give the impression that he is working to lower prices, even if he understands it is a useless and symbolic gesture? Like sending a sugar pill after lupus; it might not do anything, but it doesn’t hurt. And while appearances don’t count for much in medicine, they do in politics, so looking like you care is at least worth something.
And now Dr. House looks down at his patient, George W. Bush, and says: “Unless you don’t want a cure.” That of course, is the final symptom.
It’s never lupus.
